We tried the worst-rated Chilli Pan Mee in KL

Would it be controversial to say that if we had state-level food games, Chilli Pan Mee would be the representative for the Klang Valley? What’s not to like about this wholesome dish? It’s hearty, wholesome and if you’re brave enough, you could have it for every meal! Having lived a long, fulfilling life, I’ve also been particular about my chilli pan mee.

So, in an attempt to be adventurous, I sought the worst-rated chilli pan mee in the Klang Valley. We all know Super Kitchen and Face to Face Noodle House, so they were definitely out of the question. A thorough Google search revealed that the worst-rated chilli pan mee in the Klang Valley was being dished out at JJ Chilli Pan Mee at the Signature Food Courts in Suria KLCC.

With a mere 2.7 stars on Google from 72 reviews, patrons mostly criticised the taste of the noodles and the lack of spice in them. As we know, the key component when it comes to chilli pan mee is the CHILLI! 

You may come for me saying that my expectations should be low when it comes to food from mall food courts, but why should it? Coming from a generation raised by Pepper Lunch and Suria KLCC being one of the highest-rated malls in Malaysia, my expectations were set.

What I tried at JJ Kitchen Chilli Pan Mee

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A quick survey showed that the area in front of the stall was relatively empty which should have been a heads-up. Based on the reviews, most patrons chose to order the Homemade Pan Mee Dry (RM11.90) and the Traditional Homemade Pan Mee Soup (RM11.90) which was what I ordered as well. I also got their 3-piece wontons (RM7) as a side dish. I was shocked by the affordability of the meal, especially in comparison to the other stalls in the food court.

The noodles were prepared on the spot which was probably why the delivery took relatively long. After almost 15 minutes of waiting, first to arrive at my table was the Traditional Homemade Pan Mee Soup.

Admittedly, it did look like every other pan mee, but how about its taste? Although the noodles were freshly prepared right there, it appears that the same level of attention wasn’t applied during the cooking process of the noodles. The noodles were doughy and tough to swallow. The portion was relatively small, especially for a big eater like myself. We had to play a game of ‘Where’s Waldo’ to find the bits of meat. The only saving grace was the vege and the soup which had just the right amount of salt and MSG.

Next was the Homemade Pan Mee Dry which turned out to be the greatest disappointment. Similar to the Pan Mee Soup, the noodles were extremely doughy which ruined the overall taste of the dish. The sauce lacked any spice whatsoever and it felt like I was just consuming soy sauce. The pan mee was salvageable, thanks to the dollop of sambal provided on the side.

Turning my attention to the wontons, I wasn’t surprised that they were the instant kind. What threw me off was that they tasted old, especially considering how not crispy they were.

Amidst the chilli pan mee, one of my companions who is a vegetarian ordered a Vegetable Briyani (RM20) from the north Indian stall opposite the pan mee stall. Obviously, this isn’t related to JJ Kitchen but I believe this briyani deserves to be spoken about. I have eaten many plates of vegetarian briyani in my life but I’m not exaggerating that this was an exceptionally abysmal briyani. 

It lacked any flavour whatsoever despite smelling pretty fragrant. The briyani resembled rice with yellow colouring, stir-fried with the dreaded holy trinity (frozen peas, corn and carrot). The raita served on the side was on its way to being spoiled considering how it was left out in the open.

Final thoughts

Was JJ Kitchen Chilli Pan Mee the worst pan mee I’ve tried? Unfortunately, yes, and the reviews seem deserving. As for myself, I would rate it around 2.5 stars even with the potential it has. However, the problems with this chilli pan mee aren’t chronic and merely need little tweakings here and there to make it outstanding.

This includes cooking the noodles a little longer and amping up the spice levels. Considering how a majority of its patrons are employees of the mall, and tourists, improving their chilli pan mee would do wonders.

Expected damage: RM15 to RM20 per pax

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